Yeah! Boswell Column!
These things are few and far between with the Nats sucking like they have been, but even he couldn’t avoid the whole “More people accidently tuning their TVs to static than watching the Nats” thing.
Mostly it’s a bunch of rhetorical questions and no real answers, but some are dandy Kasten quotes in there
“We don’t run MASN. TV ratings used to be my life [with the CNN-owned Braves]. Now I pay no attention to it. It’s entirely their deal. The Nationals just get a check,” said Nats President Stan Kasten, referring to MASN and MASN2 that broadcasts all Nats and Orioles games and are predominantly owned by Angelos.
“However, this I do know,” Kasten said. With that he spread his arms toward Nationals Park, once again filling nicely, if not spectacularly, with a crowd of 26,820 that brings Washington’s average attendance to 29,689, 15th best of 30 teams. “We have always had the highest confidence about this market.”
I really like Kasten talking like Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer. “What is this ‘massenn’ you speak of? Forgive my simple caveman mind, but I don’t understand your ‘cable television’. When I turn on my 60 inch 1080i Plasma Television hanging over my marble fire place, I think ‘What type of warlock shrunk these poor people and forced them to perform for me in this little box’. It frightens and confuses me. But what doesn’t confuse me is the nearly 30 thousand people who come to see the Nationals play on any given home game!”
I also am amused by the high optimism put behind the 30K number. I spent a good deal of time looking at attendance numbers this offseason, metro sizes, teams in new ballparks, what have you and put the goal at 2.4 to 2.8 million. After seeing the dismal early seeing attendance I basically pegged the team for 2.4 million. 30K a game, if maintained, just breaks 2.4 million. Ok so I proved I’m super smart and cool, but what else?
2.4 million would NOT be great, not for a team this new in a brand new park. It would be barely acceptable. Praise shouldn’t be doled out, instead the team should sheepishly say things went as expected with a new park and young team and quietly slink away. 2.4 million in fact is a worrying figure. Now taking that number by itself I wouldn’t say that. I’d say that number indicates a fan base that is just waiting to be riled up by a winning team. However with the TV numbers we’ve seen, I can’t really say there’s a fan base waiting anywhere for anything. It’s troublesome. Bothersome. Not apocolypitc or anything. But….difficult.
“The fans we have are ample and highly appreciated. We are going to build this franchise for the long haul and do it right the first time,” said Kasten, knowing the Nats’ farm teams have the second-best combined record in the minor leagues.
“We are going to build a championship team here. The losses we are suffering now are more painful to us than to anybody else.”
We get it Stan. You are in terrible pain. Everyday you wake up and cry a single tear into your bowl of Basic 4. You carve an L into your arm for every loss just for a momentary escape from the psychological pain you are going through. It’s tough being you.
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11 Responses to “Yeah! Boswell Column!”
July 9th, 2008 at 2:58 pm
Love it! The world needs more Stan bashing!
July 9th, 2008 at 3:41 pm
Stan Kasten is a blond Tom Cruise.
Stan Kasten is a ten.
Stan Kasten is perfect in every way
Stan Kasten is the kind of man every woman dreams of. Great-looking, smart, and funny—yes, that’s Stan Kasten.
July 9th, 2008 at 4:21 pm
I’m no Stan Suck up, and the Stanspeak translator would be useful here, as would a breakdown of Boswell.
Even so, what the heck else is Stan supposed to say? “The team stinks, MASN stinks and the fans are apathetic.”
July 9th, 2008 at 5:54 pm
Yes but in a more…acceptable way such as…
“While we are building the franchise from the ground up and growing pains are to be expected, the team has not performed to the levels we, or the fans, expected this year. Also there are some aspects of the presentation of the product that we are still working with MASN to iron out. So we can understand why the numbers of viewers may be slightly behind where we would like to see them. Still we have an ardent and growing fanbase and we are pleased to be drawing nearly 30 thousand a night over a 25% increase from last year”
THAT’S Stan Speak. Not “Cable? Don’t know anything about that. Look over here!”
July 9th, 2008 at 5:54 pm
Hmm I’m like a reverse Stan Speak translator
July 9th, 2008 at 9:32 pm
I’m just glad that Boswell had the good sense to leave the part about “Good seats are going fast! Call 202-675-NATS! Make the play today!” on the cutting floor.
July 10th, 2008 at 10:54 am
I agree with your post. That you say would have been better spin.
But let me pose this–not a rhetorical question. Wouldn’t we have to say that net the team is better off with Stan than without him? I mean, I think we agree that 2 years of Bowden Unplugged was bad (I would say disastrous, I know you probably don’t). Stan has forced him into a rebuilding mode that has at least SOME hope of getting us to The First Great Nationals Team.
Frank is gone, and now we have Manny. Bowden wasn’t going to do that left to his own devices. With a better GM in Atlanta, he was magic.
I’m not saying he’s a genius, but I just don’t get why we’re supposed to hate Kasten. I seems like he’s one of the better things we have going for us. Is it just the bare fact that payroll is $55m, that we want them to “spend more to show they’re trying,” even if the team’s still a 75-win mediocrity?
Again I’m seriously interested in the critique. I lean that he’s not the problem, but I’m certainly open-minded about it.
July 10th, 2008 at 3:38 pm
If you think the attendance is mediocre this year, just wait until next year when it starts matching the current level of interest on MASN. Kasten isn’t willing to admit that the only draw is the new ball park and that won’t last a whole lot longer.
July 11th, 2008 at 9:30 am
I’ve seen a couple articles on the dismal MASN ratings. Not one of those articles ever mentioned, or even considered the issue of how the MASN productions are. The point is: the MASN broadcasts suck. Volume has random fluctuations, sometimes they talk about inane stuff, and often the announcers are just plain wrong. Give me Charlie Slowes and Dave Jagler anyday over those guys. (Yes, Sutton has some very interesting things to say half the time, but not the other half. And Carpenter . . . sheesh). And even besides that, the production is just low-rate.
Might that have something to do with the ratings? (Or is it just the team?) . . . . something that someone ought to have considered, imho
July 11th, 2008 at 9:36 am
You know, you guys are really unnecessarily morose. This year is about rebuilding. We were never going to compete, as the team is shifting it’s focus from the overpaid mediocre veterans of the MLB ownership to exciting young talent. When you look out on the field and see Harris, Kearns, Young, Belliard, Lopez, Perez, Pena with all their youth and promise how can you doubt that TV rating will go up. Oh dear. Oh dear God!
July 11th, 2008 at 6:41 pm
Nats Fan - better with Kasten. We kid because we… well “like”. He knows what he’s doing, and he’s good at it. We just wish what “he’s doing” wasn’t covering up for cheap owners, a GM that needs constant supervision, and a franchise struggling at putting together a fanbase.
Dunn - For now let’s just hope everything goes well in the 2nd half and we are looking at a decent team next year,
DC Wonk - I don’t get MASN broadcasts so I don’t know. I’ve heard they are bad, but not THAT bad. Seems like you disagree…
Ben -No! Avert your eyes! The other half of the field! For god’s sake, look at the other half!!
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