illustration by Samara Pearlstein
boo birds escort Tigers out of Detroit
What… was… that?
Seriously: what did I just see on my TV? Was it baseball? I’m not entirely sure. It LOOKED like baseball, but I’m inclined to believe that it was simply a very detailed fake. ‘Cause, kids and kittens, that can’t have been baseball. Nine runs for Verlander with only 4 earned? Five double plays turned against us? These are things you see when some crazy kids are playing video game baseball. That is not REAL baseball.
Maybe it’s an elaborate metaphor or something. I certainly appreciated the tidy symbolism of all the bases clearing as soon as we went to the bullpen. Really summed up the confidence we all have in the bullpen right now, plus the futility of life and indeed human existence itself, all in a single at-bat. That was very artistically done.
Thank cats we’ve got Bobby Seay, right? A scoreless 1-2-3 inning, that’s what Bobby Seay threw today, in a game where the White Sox put up 13 runs on 12 hits and 6 walks. Good work, Bobby Seay. You’re an inspiration to us all.
It was kind of amazing to see Sheffield out there, actually hitting the baseball. It’s hard to imagine the kind of pain he must be in (when not heavily drugged up) and there he is, playing through it. I guess Gary Sheffield is an inspiration to us all as well.
I have little else to say. I still don’t really believe that was an actual baseball game, so what is there to talk about? Ugh.
Monday’s an offday (thank cats), and Tuesday we start my most/least favorite thing in the world, a series against the Red Sox. Normally I would be AT these games, but the Fenway series is so early in the season this year that I’m still in Michigan, and thus have to miss it. WOE.
Hilarious note for the upcoming series: the Tigers were just swept (a billion times, it seems) at home, and the Red Sox were just swept by the Blue Jays on the road (after having been on the road for a billion years, it seems). Everyone is talking about how much good it’ll do the Sox to get home. Everyone (or, OK, mostly Joe Morgan tonight) is talking about how it’ll do the Tigers some good to get on the road. Rock, meet Hard Place.
Speaking of Joe Morgan, I assume you all noted how Carlos Guillen committed his ugly error immediately after Joe Morgan rambled on at some length about the way Carlos was sure to become a Gold Glove first baseman this season. Morgan started chuckling and saying, “I put a hex on him!” I think I speak for all Tigers fans when I say: WE’RE NOT LAUGHING, JOE. STOP SAYING THINGS LIKE THAT.
It’s not that we’re especially superstitious cats, but I think our tolerance for that sort of thing is pretty low at the moment.
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12 Responses to “boo birds escort Tigers out of Detroit”
April 6th, 2008 at 9:05 pm
BOOOOOOOO
April 6th, 2008 at 10:41 pm
I post at Motown Sports.com and right now, fans are already giving in. I even saw a thread where fans want Leyland fired if you can believe that.
Again, it’s way too early. They will be fine. They are going to go on a winning streak later this year so it works itself out. With the talent they have, they are not going to be bad. Now if this continues to May, then all bets are off.
April 7th, 2008 at 3:12 am
The Tigers will get it going. But this is one ugly start.
April 7th, 2008 at 5:29 am
[…] at Roar of the Tigers, Samara Pearlstein is deep in the denial stage. “What… was… that? Seriously: what did I […]
April 7th, 2008 at 7:40 am
oops, I meant to put this here… my chin, it is down. way down. I know in 20 games we’ll forget this slide ever happened…but right now this is like the longest week EVER.
April 7th, 2008 at 7:51 am
You know, I like the Onion as much as the next dork, but every so often they have a sort of Comedy Nervous Breakdown and put out something that’s just not funny at all, except in a chilling sort of WTF way. But this time, this week, I think they speak for all of us.
April 7th, 2008 at 8:07 am
That half-inning with Seay was pretty great. The team just seems to have more confidence with him on the mound. The best part was when he went to the full count on Anderson, he walked around the mound a bit, giving his defense a little breather. That’s veteranosity, right there. Then he induced the inning-ending groundout that kept the Tigers within seven runs. An inspirational performance.
(He entered the game around the 2:11 mark, if anyone wants to watch that half-inning again.)
My theory is that Leyland is planning to get all 64 regular season losses out of the way at once, so the Tigers can maximize their momentum going into the playoffs.
April 7th, 2008 at 12:44 pm
You’re right, that game DID look like a video game — specifically, when I used to play MVP 2005 and make all the opposing fielders really slow.
April 8th, 2008 at 5:12 am
Dave, you and the birds both.
Leslie, there are crazies on every board, even the good boards.
Leshnock, so we all hope.
tiff, man, no kidding, this is like the worst way to start the season. This is supposed to be FUN (OK, maybe I’m having a little fun…)
Matt, they’ve described the Detroit baseball scene perfectly!
Mike, VETERANOSITY!!!11! Yeah, I dunno, Seay’s been solid. Maybe because we’re still not asking too much from him. Unfortunately, we do have to ask a bit much from some guys, and they have thus far been pretty unequal to the task.
dave w, exactly. Or when you make the pitcher unreasonably bad or something. I don’t know, I’m not a gamer. I just have a sense that this is more likely when the game is being controlled by a snickering kid than when it’s real. Can’t be real, then.
April 8th, 2008 at 8:50 am
I’m still relatively unconcerned. I’m still relatively unconcerned. I’m still relatively unconcerned. La la la.
April 8th, 2008 at 10:46 am
I guess this now means that we can’t tie the “84″ Tigers for best start to a season 35-5!
April 8th, 2008 at 6:18 pm
ivan, yeeeeaaah. You let me know if that mantra helps at all.
Jim, dammit! It’s true! That simple goal is beyond us now. Wild may our weeping be.
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