MVN - Most Valuable Network

Thursday’s Best - Game, Set, Match

5. Gambling Problems – According to a Las Vegas prosecutor, Charles Barkley, a.k.a. the Round Mound of Doubling Down, amassed a $400,000 gambling debt during a stay at the Wynn last October. A civil complaint states that Barkley has refused to repay his debt on multiple occasions, and will face possible criminal charges. Which is step one of my great idea for a TV show: Charles Barkley is incarcerated and Kenny Smith breaks him out thanks to an elaborate escape plan that he has tattooed all over his body. I call it “Jail Escape”.

Charles in Charge has made no attempt to hide his gambling, even admitting in the past that he’s probably lost “around $10 million”. But it’s something he can afford to do and he’s not hurting anyone, so why stop? That’s the same logic that drove me to buy “Pootie Tang” on DVD.

4. Justine Henin – After spending over 100 weeks as the Number 1 female tennis player in the world, Justin Henin has decided to put an end to her career at the ripe old age of 25. The 7-time Grand Slam champion became the first woman to retire as the top ranked player, citing a lack of motivation as her reason. The petite Henin was constantly faced with bigger and stronger opponents, and her unmatched tenacity was her biggest asset. Now that she’s retired, I’m sure she’ll bring that same aggressive and intense demeanor to mahjong.

What’s with this new trend of female athletes retiring abruptly, with plenty of good years left? Annika Sorenstam, Justine Henin, next thing you know, Vince Carter is going to call it quits.

3. Blundering Base Running – Thanks in part to fantastic fielding and a timely rally, Nats starter Jason Bergmann had me saying “blerg, man”. Mike Pelfrey carried a no-hitter into the 7th, but was on the losing end of a 1-0 game in which Bergmann fanned nine. This was his first game back from Triple-A, after sporting an 11.68 ERA through his first three starts. Willie Harris made a diving catch to rob Ryan Church of a double in the ninth, and Carlos Beltran was doubled up off third to end the game. Meanwhile, my blood pressure doubled.

The play that has Mets fans scratching our enormous, baseball-shaped heads was Luis Castillo sacrificing Jose Reyes to second. The speedster decided to go for third base, but was thrown out by a mile. The old adage states that you should never make the first or last out of an inning at third, but I fail to see the value in making the second out at third, either. In fact, the Mets would probably be better off if they just stopped making outs all together, regardless of which out it is and which base they’re at.

2. 1990s Role Players – The Phoenix Suns are a very good team with a very big coaching vacancy. But rather than search for someone to build on their high-powered offense, it appears that Steve Kerr is looking for someone who shares his love of grunge music and “Saved by the Bell”. Possible candidates thus far have included Terry Porter, Vinny Del Negro, Jeff Hornacek, Marc Jackson and Kurt Rambis. I guess Tree Rollins had a prior engagement.

While this seems like a can’t-miss idea, the Suns are also entertaining a few people with actual coaching experience. These candidates include Boston assistant Tom Thibodeau, Houston assistant Elston Turner, and former Cavs coach Paul Silas. Hopefully, Phoenix comes to their senses and goes with a random retired player. Just look how successful Isiah Thomas was!

1. Ryan Dumpster – Normally, 8 1/3 scoreless against the punch-less Padres is nothing to write home about. But after a 12-strikeout, 6-hit performance, Dempster got out his finest stationary and penned a lovely letter to his parents. The win puts Chicago nine games over .500 and if it wasn’t for Brandon Webb-slinger winning his ninth straight start, the Cubs would be tied for the best record in all of baseball. So much for your neighborhood Spiderman being friendly.

The Cubs’ biggest concern with moving Ryan Dempster to their rotation was whether or not he could cut down on his walks. But thanks to his best K/BB ratio since 2000, the Ryan Express is chugging along nicely. Dempster will look to continue his newfound success by beating the tar out of Robin Ventura.

This entry was posted on Thursday, May 15th, 2008 at 9:38 pm and is filed under Today's Best, Tennis, MLB, NBA. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.